Thanks Vicky for makin me write this,
Thanks suu... for letting vicky know that i write too!

“Is it 12 already?” shrieks a Martian voice. “Oh my god, AKKA! Please 5 minutes Akka, please...” squeak a couple of Venusians’ voices in unison. And the countdown begins, as the lady chauffer ( ‘cause she drives us mad, almost everytime) starts off with her coerces - her bad “black-mail” attempts, plus the male security guards, who suddenly out of nowhere, come off for their “unimportant” rescue mission of how-to-clear-the junction-traffic with their initial ‘pleases’ and ‘will you’s’ and later leading to ‘lemme complain to the C.E.O’ (they ought to get a bit more creative Please!!) and in the end they win (hands down of course) and so it all comes to an end. The whole thing looks so comic and sometimes we, the Venusians walk back to our planet laughing out louder than we are supposed to which wakes our den’s manager (we being the damager of her peace) up. Time goes by so swiftly when you’re, well... err... at the junction, for ANY reason!! But wait, where did this all start?? To know that, you gotta know this:
“The junction” is actually, technically speaking, the unification spot of the crooked route to designer-hood, the Mars and the Venus. In Brief, an open, sunny and busy space of “multiple-utility” and an inevitable part of our hostel life. No no, don’t be too creative, it’s just a “radii manipulated” road that leads into the areas mentioned above. It’s the last spot where both the elements from different planets meet and after which they are ought to become aliens living in different hells or heavens. I leave it for you to decide.
It’s amazing how no matter of which part of the year, as in be the peak-jury-fever-times or the cool sem-jus-started times, the traffic in the junction never comes down to a zero, ever.
The junction carries a curse (lol), Thanks to our dear chauffer’s narrow mind’s interpretation of what the damagers oops, I mean the Managers of either hostels have said “no one should be seen at the junction”.so to just make her a bit happy we now shifted about 2 meters away from the actual median, to the old hunched light man (The pole) so that we are “officially not at the junction”. She said “sit anywhere but the junction”. Didn’t she??
Birthday parties, social interaction sessions, waiters, discussion boards, did i say Gossips?? Street light dinners, culturals, a trade-centre: to be mentioned, the business centre for the producer (usually the Venusians) and the consumer or rather the hog-head (you know who!) and the traded (anything, I mean ANY-THING!!!). Apart from us, so called humans there are lil so called reptiles (don’t we find them so much similar to a few members of our cult?) who bite on the arses of innocent *ahem ahem* adians!
You can’t call it yet a day here until you haven’t bid adieu at the junction to your loved or not so loved ones. So while at the verge of leaving this over trafficked lil area, they almost shed tears and say “bye, byes” and “Good nights” as If singing, “Leavin’ on a jet plane...”
And so the days at Dj goes on and on and ends at junction every single day, (for some, begins there too). With so many things happening how can one ‘not be’ at the junction??

One who has walked through the tunnel of light would be able to respond to me in coherence... irony is something that still reminds me i'm alive!

Is life just the distance between the two points birth and death?
and whats that which is said, Death and beyond?
do you earn love just to teach,
how to miss when i'm gone?
how to cry, how to get devoid,
how to just, learn to kill myself
to give up the life, where you are nowhere.

sometimes i think I'm religious,
and the rest, I'm sure of being an atheist with a spiritual face.
but if god does exist, can't he give a 3 month notice before taking life.
says one part of my wandering mind,

the other part believes, if its sure to be death,
be it uninformed, be it random but...
why not give it swifter and in moments puff you reach the light,
no more walking slowly, advancing with painful little leaps to the end of the tunnel
where the angels or the demons,
wait for you with wishes or curses...

death has always been and will be a fascinating topic to discuss upon...
but not like today,
when i see a man with his leg twisted lying under the tyre tracks,
his legs are contorted?? why?? oh yeah i know now (as i take a glance on the other side of his dead body)... his intestine or whatever they are are already out there lying under the tyres, with blood and he has a blank reaction on his face, neither pain nor the suffering of it... he is dead, even before he realized. he must have flown through the tunnel for sure..!

a little lift that acts funny?? No... this ain't no time for funny lift fictions (though this lift sure does act funny at times, or rather strange... i should stop beating around the bushes... atleast here, Today!!)
This post is about funny little conversations that happen inside a considerably large lift (one that can hold 26 persons on god knows what weight would fall into this category??)
I study in PSG, yeah a couple of software courses and i'm one of the luckiest i could enter into THE (not any random) engineering college (being an arts student pursuing design).
These guys have a lift at the Y block, the 3rd floor is where my class is. And its practically 'tough' (not impossible) to climp all the way to the 3rd floor avoiding all the wary glances of the nerds and the wanna be guys and girls and their 'butler' ingileess (english as they say it) and me being someone who doesn't look familiar, and no, i can't be a fresher! And so I prefer the lift, and the conversation of the students which probably had started when the lecturer went off or while waiting for the Lift would continue inside the lift. The ones who got in at the 3rd floor have a topic running and the ones that join from the second have different ones and in addition to the ones that join from the first year, Sometimes one could make out stories out of the words that come out from differnt gangs and that could possible turn out to be what one could term as a perverse storyteller..!!
This being the only little enjoyment at this point of time... how could one not laugh when you are at the groundfloor and the people think... who is this nutcrak??




Ganesh, a God who is considered the Prime and who is almost loved by every hindu kid. It was His day yesterday and he enlightened me a bit on his daily basis..

There was a Thought on my head, I don't know what brought it up. Was that the speech By Shri. Arun Madhavan, a spiritual teacher, singer and author ? or was it the mood of the Ganesh Chaturthi. Whatever was the reason, The finding was enough to astonish me.



In Hinduism, It is considered whatever comes from the 5 elements (earth, fire, water, sky, air) to us is being taken back by them at some point of time. That is what our ancestors have been believing for the past God knows how many decades. Thats the reason why we make our Ganesha idols out of mud, clay which is from the earth and offer it flower and perform puja and send it back to the earth from where it came from.(courtesy : Arunji)

This thought suddenly took me to the past where i remembered the words of H. W. Longfellow, The Psalm of life, " Dust thou art, to dust returnest, Was not spoken of the soul." Means the Genesis had actually mentioned the same, what goes around comes around. The karma of the dust, the Earth!

On the other hand, Ganesha is portrayed as being the "nirvikalp, Nirakar...."- meaning the formless and the one that is beyond atributes and wishes of the earthly life. Which is nothing but what the Islam preaches as the "One Divinity - ALLAH" (courtesy : Arunji)

Waiting, yes waiting for him to come,
We came all the way from home
To spend a little few minutes
With the man who changed our lives
Who we owe until the end
End of not just our lives, its more.
May be the end of the world, perhaps!

Guruji, Guruji, everyone’s mind heart and soul
Echoes the same thing, their eyes fixed
On the road where the vehicles never stop
Every time a luxury car crosses
Adrenaline shoots up and until the tip of my fingers
On which lay my camera, waiting
Waiting to snap shot a moment, a proof,
I was close to him, a prestige to one’s ego!

Still waiting, my feet conflicting with my will
I’ll wait and take pictures, and won’t I?
Won’t I ever give this pain a damn?
The fight goes on and on
Thoughts gush in waves, I know they’re unwanted.
My heart wants to comment on my neighbours’ outfit
No! I shush it... There is no time to think crap.
I say, “Concentrate, concentrate, dear mind...
One second missed is a huge leap...”
“Yes” my mind replies, “I’m trying”
After all, all I need is to.... Talk?
Nope, all I need is to just see him,
Click a picture of him, a masterpiece?
No, who wants a masterpiece, that’s just for professionals,
All I have to do is catch his smile,
Or giving me a glimpse, an eye contact,
Or just a half profile face at the least.
And what do I need for that?
Luck? A bit of blessings or perhaps more blessings,
Who needs luck when you are in the premise?
The premise of divine presence.

Does this soulmate thing exist?? did i really find my soulmate? ofcourse i so totally believe i did... he's perfectly how i wished.. but is that true you should marry your soulmate.. just when you are 19.. should you even think about the teram marriage, is marriage worth it?? or be it a realationship that absolutely runs as if its goal is marriage? whay can't soulmates be just friends? or may be a relationship unnamed cauze i'm an aquarian who calls even an aquaintance as a friend!

"I'm in a snit, 'cause my only slip knot was snicked. Hail the spitfire the, now stricken, snap dragon slicked!!!"

i felt bad.. cause i broke it open.. into pieces of comprehendable words, just in case he mis understands,.. and as i doubted he did mis understand..!! :)


"the flecked coin fliped with a slick flick, of the fink, n flew to the final flank,
fling! a friend turned foe and a foe to a forever friend, in just the right click!"

I went back.. spoke again.. proved my point n here i am... gained a friend back who became a foe.. made him a friend for life.. what more do i need.. a frameless photograph... merged on the wall in a camouflage!

The angel of death called upon me to say

That it be my last stay on earth, today!

I wish I could go back in time, check on all my deeds,

To find out what I have lost in those mysterious woods as seeds,

Of time and of emotions, that I buried deep in the crevasse of my heart

Feeling bereft, I look forward to be nocturnal, and ready to depart.

Praying the darkness wouldn’t break off the woods for now,

So I could take all my time and count what that was, I strew.

Death was coming, and I sit here till its breaking dawn

But wait, there ain’t gonna be no more sun on my horizon!


While a tear drop roll down my cheek, reaching the back of my palm,

The sky cracks open, making it sparkle like a gem, in its flawless gleam,

I tried to pause, but my heart did not cease from its gallop

Brilliant light blinding my eyes, making my escape plans flop.

Million more sparkling stars cracked above my head, adding to the sepulchral light

i shut in, surrendering myself, to the world of nocturnal gloom, confining my sight.

Everything muted, so did my heart, I raised the curtain, yet hesitantly

To find her ever warming smile, greet me in peace, hospitality!

The angel eyes shine, tinted liquid gold, sparkling light in the darkness.

She says onto my ear, “Welcome home, Little Princess!” (Lil angel??)

Human


Tree

Diamond

Owl

Sky
















"The wings of Pyre,
Flutterin' on cold flames of ice,
Offerin' to the whole wide world...
Hot ice cubes
and ice cold Luke warm water!
its all written....



....'n i believe and know for sure
that i've got the eraser!!!"

Im too fast now
everything ahead of me is red... dangerous?
and everything on my 'right' is brightest white that i cant see through !
and who's beside me? an alien??
i wonder as he merges into one of the reds...
i search for a change a change to turn n merge into one of the whites..
a seem to be safer resort.
and yeah i did get a way i took a 'U' merging myself into the bright whites...
aliens again beside me
and its all red again ahead of me...
i realized i'm always white on the face and read on the rear...
i laughed at my stupidity, courteously and took another you...


well night driving on the road could be so much fun. =D

His name is nitish, he's small, cute and adorable and Intuitive!
whenever me or dad go on to our bike or when mom walks out through the gates, he says.. "hi" and we say Hi...and then he'll be like... "where are you going?"... we'd say.. the location..and then the next questions "why do you need to go??". That put me into trouble for the first time.
Too often when i go somewhere i know where i'm going and how and how long its gonna take, but my real necessity for going there remains unknown to me. A lot of times, we are unaware of the real reason for doing somethings. Haven't we been doing things out of compulsion, you still have no idea nor any regret but keep doing it monotonously without any Reason to do it??
So what? we still do the same now... decades past... like i dont really know why i write blogs, take quiz on facebook!

we were walking, when Dad tossed a coin at the begger on the pavement of Race course.
Since i joined DJ, i've not been a regular walker unlike dad who cribbs for missing a day! anyways, today was no special than any other day but just that thought that dad gives him money everyday struck me. I out of curiosity asked him, "do you give him money everyday??". His answer was quite what i expected but the reason startled me. He said a yes in a simple nod and added, "in a few more years, you cant see people begging on the road much" he said in a melancholious tone and i wondered isn't that something to be happy about?
Guess he noted my reaction and continued his defence or perhaps the reason as it should be adressed, "you wont get punya then cause you cant do charity, so better do it now so that you accumlate enough of virtue to take us to heaven" and he smiled as we fastened our pace.

all i could do was shrug.... but deep in me the lunatic started working again...'nice thought process' it said in a low tone only i could hear!

me n mom were just leaving home...
i was waiting for her in my usual pose, sitting on the dio, hands folded on the speedo, that was when the boy from the groundfloor, nitish (appu) i suppose.. shouted out through the netted window.. his eyes sparkling with enthusiasm, (he just loves it when my mom goes on a walk!!), "where are you going aunty??" in his typical kid's tamil. It struck me for a moment.. did he just ask where i am going? is he supposed to ask that? isn't it considered to be inauspicious that way?

Well.. these thoughts just took a second to pass by...actually not even a second just a fraction, but the thought of why is still haunting me.
Is it just because someone had adviced me not to ask anyone where they are going, because they believed it was inauspicious and that the task that they are going would not turn out successful. Is it so deeply etched in my mind that it takes me away for a moment and lets me back, its fascinating the way mind works. BUT WHY is it so complicated to understand?

there is something in about life.. thats intoxicating me...
pullin me further..

Making me live.,..!!!

I'm a parasite,
Unlike one that drinks up your blood.. i suck up your trust to me...make you trust me.. hold your hand in moments you need.. and in turn.. you be my sidekick.. you love me for what i am...I show you dreams in your gazy eyes.... dreams of long term friendship and Love....a thincker silverlining in your clouds of dreams.....puffs of clouds on every line...taking you...making you feel.. your dreams come true... thats all cause, I NEED YOU..!!!

Days go by....I turn bored of you....time to search for a new host....your blood starts tasting bitter....familiarity ruins the thrill...unsaid, uninformed..i walk away....leaving you weep in despair..."whose mistake was it afterall". You think its you....i say not a word...you conclude its you...or perhaps sadistically, console yourself that it was me.. but why..?? You never know.... or perhaps would never be able to understand....

Am i selfish....is that only me?
Or is it possible that everyone is but none did realize they were?
why did i have to talk about it then..?? what made me realize the truth behind every act i did...the reason for everything i did do and will be doing is right there within me.... and how did ONE person bring that out....what made me open to share.. what made me realize myself....Is that love for myself.. or love for my fellow human beings' FLESH and more... that makes them.. "them"!!

..."I just came out from your studio... you were no where to be seen in the campus since morning...where were you??" he said.... swiveling his pen drive pivoted in his long fingers...and added... "You know my concepts got approved...I just love them...!” slowly shifting his glace down towards me, he for the first time noted, "What are you doing exactly??" I was doing something more than just listening....something down under..."fidgeting with your shoe laces...?"

I frowned... "Just trying to get it right...I'm too bad at this...!" still, not looking at his face.
"Let me help you" he came down and finished the work in factions of seconds... something I was struggling to do for the past five minutes perhaps.

Suddenly I heard a tune up surging from the background where it seemed to have merged all this while....a fusion mix...perhaps a familiar tune...which my mind seized to recognize... I looked at his eyes, wondering, "Guess.... your phone's ringing...."

He stared at me as he shoved in, his hand into one of his pant pockets... and frowned... "NO!!", "may be... yours". He gave an irked look making me feel more confound...

Before I could let a word in dismay, I could feel my hands quiver wit my mobile on my hand....something strange happened... I could feel the earth vibrating...in a rhythm... that matched the tune that became more prominent now...more emphatic and very much obtrusive.
The whole surrounding seemed to blur and darken...and the vibration on my head...more like... Under one ear...I clamped my ears in my palms and tightened my eyes' closure...a fear....an impeccable commotion in my brain...causing me a head ache...

I so totally had forgotten him...and bravely to confront that annoyance I opened my eyes with enormous effort, to find him nowhere around now... 'twas just a few laundry clothes...tables with books...an empty cot and perfectly made bed...and my phone's alarm still buzzing under my pillow...and I lie....flat on my stomach on my cot...!!

I pulled it out to snooze it and checked it was 5.00am...and it was still dark outside...
I strive hard to keep my eyes open... but the shutter was automatic....!

There was a tug off war between me and my sleep, for the next few minutes..... sleep won.... and I, closed my windows to the world again to transcend to a graceful sleep.... just until...the turmoil started all over again...but this time... a different tune altogether... 'twas mom, waking me up... I promised that I’d be up in a few minutes and hung-up. I realized it was 5.30 already… antagonizing the fleet of time...and with no other way out...I woke up...walking like an insomniac to the rest rooms....and the auto-shutter stopped its collision as I splashed water.... I wondered if man was just another mechanism that desists with water....and off I go...spurting through my chores of the day...

Deepthi told me...write what you think about yourself... jus gave it a try.... hmm.. 'm more interesting than i thought i am..!!!

read these to see the world through my eyes.
Well, thats' not gonna make any difference......

I like people being themselves.I like being myself.I like chocolates.I like ice-cream.I like adventures.I like cold coffee.i like cold coffee topped with cream.i like froth.i like fizzzzz.I like talking.I like talking a lot.I like talking to strangers.I like making friends.I like falling in love.I like the thesaurus than dictionary.I like rain.I like getting wet in rain.I love rain.I hate working without interest.I like freedom in my own terms.I like long walks.I like talking spiritual with dad.I like people trusting me.I like trusting people.I like having crushes.I like being in short term commitments.i like quick shopping.I like fresh air gushing onto me.I like speed.I like split second decisions.I like shilly-shally mood swings.I like being spontaneous.I like being humorous.I like laughing at my own jokes.I like smiling with no reason.I like to cry on someone's shoulder.I like saying "can't we still be friends?" after a breakup.I like my friends.I like music.I like getting stranded in a lonesome place with a chosen friend.I like to dance when no one's around.I dance to loud music in my studio.I like to sing in the shower.I like being noticed, not for looks.I believe in my dreams.I like day dreaming.I like fall more than spring.I like spring more than summer.I like summer the least.I like tea.I like beating around bushes.I like consoling and counseling.I like having cheap desires.I like lil things of life.I like night.I like darkness.I like the moon.and like lying on the terrace and gazing stars.I like to cry occasionally.I like my eyes.I like expressive eyes.I like songs with good lyrics but tune matters too.I like sharing secrets.I like stripes.I like circles.I like retro (except for the psychedelic shades).I like flip-flops.I like my mobile.I like computers.I like Photoshop.I like the internet.I like sweet people.I like art of any kind.I like blogging.I like English.I like English music.I like melody.I like melancholy.I like the guitar.I like French…I like spicy life.I like the word like.I love the word love.I like to say love in place of all likes.I like saying I love you.I like hearing someone saying I love you… like talking about death,but I'm no sadist.I like jumping around.I like sleeping.I like taking charge.I like being lonely with music.I like going out with friends.I like partying.I like being with people who like being with me.I like being loud.I like waling on sea shore.I like collecting wrappers…I like nature…I like soft toys.I like surprises.I like gifts.I like Christmas.I like colors.I like writing this way.I like my grandma's rasam.I like talking to plants.

I believe lil pleasures are often the greatest happiness.I love kids.I love my dad.I believe in reincarnation.I believe a peck n hug can heal anything.

I don’t like to throw away stuffs after use.I don’t like to keep secrets of myself.I hate sad faces.I hate marriage.I hate breaking hearts but do it.I hate being ignored.I hate being concerned about beauty.I hate pink.I don't understand sarcasm.I hate it when I lose the keys.I hate being taken for granted.I hate male chauvinist.I hate waking up early.I hate being a bookworm.I hate biographies.I hate non fiction.I hate being shackled.I hate pessimism.I hate breaching trust.I hate racists.I hate hypocrites.I hate drama queens.

To be added….


Its Jagannathan’s class now… on technical studies... and we are watching videos “modern marvels...” This current video is on the evolution of how... a computer was born... I’m drowsy and needed a siesta... so I just curled down the handle of my plastic chair… cloaking myself behind kamal’s back…. Thoughts just glided on my mind... a slideshow of the timeline... of my life… and computers…
I remember... when I was quite young... well... like about in my 4th or 5th class.... Mom had this course organized by school on computers at CSC, a famous chain of computer tutors in Coimbatore as well as in Tamilnadu... (I never liked them :|)
well, coming back to the story, I had gone there with mom... one day...and I saw these kids of my age... from a bit more of posh family I guess, learning computers... they were drawing some lines in black on a white page with a mechanical device which they held on their hand.. It was strange... yet amusing to my young mind... I wondered what it was... and asked them and the tutor said they are learning "paint" I was like what on earth is that...?? Since then… my young mind had an interest on learning that “box full of fun”.

Once when I went to my dad’s office, a nice college of my dad spoke to me with all care n affection... he offered me a picture of my choice from his computer onto my hand... I chose a dancing peacock…And voila, a half A4 sized photograph of my favorite picture in my hand in just a matter of a few minutes. I still have that picture in my diary of chocolate wrappers and birthdates. Whenever dad used to call me there was this sound of the inkjets behind his back… I used to wonder if I was really awake…
The first time dad took me to the browsing centre with him, I was just made to sit next to him... on the extra stool provided….I used to find it so boring... but still hesitated to express him the fact... I also wanted to use a PC… even I want to search on the net...those were what ran in my head’s LCD screen...
Once… I went with him... go knows what had he felt... he had booked for two cabins in place of one... and obviously it was me in the second… and well… what more would I do.. I drew a Hill in brown with green vegetation over it in paint… for about 30-40 minutes. There was this sense of Creative ability in me…my first ever digital Art!!!
JComputers being my utter love at this age… I used to love it more than anything…I craved for it, dreamt it... and at last... Got it too…
My uncle gifted one of his used computers when I was in my 9th standard…. Only I and the friends around me during the painting workshop know how bouncy I got on that day… My father didn’t really allow me to use it much…. He feared I might spoil it... as I don’t really know how to handle it and also a slight fear of the “viruses”… This added my curiosity to use it even more…. It started a craving for using the computer… dad created my online identity for the first time now… the first yahoo of mine... which doesn’t exist anymore now…

And that being my first ever computer in life… I started learning to use the internet…went with friends to browsing centers, created new ids…. Searched a lot... did a lot…. And still doing a lot… Internets’ taught me a lot… cheated me a lot…made me into something I never thought I could be… never wanted to be… and also a lot of me which I am proud of now…
It made me a blogger…made me more productive, creative…fast paced… and yet... let me be myself… Thanks PC…I’d have been here without you... but... not this happy…!!!

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there,
Had worn them really about the same

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference !

-- Robert Frost (1874–1963)



well... this was always one poem i applied onto my life...the one i learnt in my standard 10 but realized now...

Somewhere deep in me...i might still yearn to have taken the trodden path... but when it is the question of "would i have been happier that way?" yeah sure i would have... but "would i have learnt so much then... ??", "would my life be a bit more meaningful now than before?", "do i know myself more now.. than before?"... the bitter truth is yes... and i'm happy i am here...!!!

In my case....

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere two and a half year hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference !

I dont give a shit to people who mock at me now....cause I'm msel cause these thorns taught me to be that way.. which their tar layered roads seize from them..... :)

contrast isn't the domination of one on another it is the fight between both the parties frozen. when I consider contrast, I think of the Ying and yang.